Gayle HWARNING: This is not a post about a new diet. This is not a post about prepping your food. This is not a post about intermittent fasting, diet pills, or other trending weight loss solutions. I respect all weight loss ideas if they work for you. But if you are looking for those to be the answer to my ‘how’, you will be disappointed.
Just setting your expectations up front.
We’re going to start with a full disclosure physical and mental strip down of my health. While I am not someone who enjoys sharing personal details, I believe that you deserve to understand the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth about where I was, where I am now, and what I learned.
- I am 52 years and 8 months old
- I was in the best shape of my life when I was 44 years old (seriously, that was the first year I wore a bikini in my life!)
- I am officially, and proudly, in menopause (and relieved – seriously)
- I gained 26 pounds between the ages of 46 and 52 – and I think most of that from my neck down through my abdomen, but stopped at the top of my legs. Good news yes, bad news – I look a bit like a chicken; lots of middle parts, skinny little legs
- Traveling with Rj around the country doing art shows is awesome – except for the toll it takes on my eating and exercising routine
- Wait, no, I want to reword that last bullet – except for the excuses it gave me to not eat well and skip exercise (see what I did there?? A little choice/reframe fun. If you didn’t pick that up, reread please)
- OK, back to the data
- I am a certified health coach – which in my mind means I should know what actions to take to stay healthy and fit. And I do! Knowing and Doing are two very different verbs
- Let’s be honest – gaining weight during peri/menopause is a given, right? (Do you see another excuse in that sentence?)
- The added weight, and other factors like age/genes/lifestyle, have left me with high blood pressure and hypothyroidism. I hate having to take pills.
- I have notes in my journal dating back to 2015 (when I started to get annoyed by the weight gain) on what I would do each month/week/day to lose weight. Yes, four years of journaling my goals, analyzing my stats, and continuing to gain weight.
OK. Now you know how I started 2019 physically. Mentally? Well, I was frustrated. Frustrated with myself for knowing what I could do to help myself, but not committing to take those actions. Frustrated that I couldn’t figure out how to commit to taking actions that I know I should.
Because I am a life coach people!! Shouldn’t I be able to do what I coach others to do? Make a choice to better my life, commit to doing just that, get my road map in place, and off I go to my goal. Right?
To be fair to me, I did do some very good things for my health. I started drinking a Fab4 Smoothie every day. I found ways fit more exercise into my day. And I am thankful for the fact that I do believe these actions precluded me from gaining more weight.
But I wanted to lose weight. And that damn scale would not move.
Sidebar (that will prove important insight for the end of this story): I love food. I am very in tune with how my body feels when it’s ‘light’ vs. ‘heavy’. I never want to be the ‘kill joy’ at the restaurant – you know, the person who orders the salad because they are ‘on a diet’. I care what other people think of my eating habits. I know that being a health/life coach, people watch what I eat, and I never want to look like a lunatic (hence why I did not drink green smoothies up until January of 2019).
Back to my story. On July 4th of this year, Rj and I left for a two month cross country trip to do art shows. I was terrified for my weight gain.
We had finally settled into our new condo in Portland. We had just gotten into a fairly regular exercise routine at a gym we love. We were eating healthier. We have a goal of hiking across the United Kingdom to celebrate our 60th birthdays.
So things were starting to gel. A Goal. A road map. Commitment to action. Actual action!
But now, for two months, we would be in a situation that, in the past, had been my weight gain hell: sitting for 8 hours a day driving, not cooking my own meals and ‘treating’ ourselves on weekends during the show to food we may not normally bring into the house because ‘we were on the road’.
I sat with my journal. How could I see this situation as an opportunity to do something different in relation to my weight goals vs. a prison sentence to weight gain?
I prepared: I figured that since we were towing our ‘home’ with us, in the form of a travel trailer, I could control some of the food that I ate. So I packed our traveling circus full of healthy options. And brought my Nutribullet.
I found resources: I downloaded the app from our gym that provides exercise programs when you are unable to get to the gym.
I journaled more: Putting myself in the mindset for success. I can do this. This is good for me. I will be a menopausal weight loss story.
I used all my coaching skills on myself.
Human beings are funny though, right? We can set ourselves up for success all we want to, but if we have that little nagging voice in our head that says, “You’ve tried this before, why do you think it will work this time?”, or “But you are traveling, so don’t deprive yourself!”, or “You are 52, no female loses weight at 52, but OK, good luck”, we’ll never hit our objective?
That little voice is the biggest influencer in our ability to truly hit our goals. When that little voice isn’t aligned with all of your good work (goal setting, preparation, mind set alignment, planning), then hitting your goals is a very difficult task.
So Rj and I get on the road. And our first stop is Cape Cod. Our previous home town. Filled with friends, restaurants we haven’t been to in months, and an early morning show set up (which is usually rewarded with an egg sandwich from our local coffee shop).
Good intentions. Great planning. Success mindset. GONE. And it only took the first night’s cheeseburgers, fries and celebratory extra glass of wine to derail me!
Here’s where things got interesting for me.
Remember I told you that we had gotten into a regular exercise routine? Sure, we had only been home for a month and a half, but we were pretty diligent.
Remember I told you that how I had gotten pretty good at ‘feeling’ when my body felt good/light vs. bloated/bad/heavy?
Remember when I told you I loved food?
Remember when I told you – wait, I haven’t told you this one yet. In 2018 I tried out a health coaching program. For many reasons – 1) I wanted to lose weight 2) I love health oriented research and always try things out on myself 3) There was a potential to get certified in this style of health coaching, so there was my personal development goal for 2018.
I love goal-layering. One action, multiple benefits.
You may be getting excited that I’m about to tell you this program changed my life, is the reason for my weight loss, and I am now selling my services as a certified professional for this group.
Well, it didn’t quite go like that, but I learned a lot.
There was one thing that program did teach me that stuck with me: Eat until you are 80% full.
This concept actually didn’t work for me as presented in this manner. Eating until I was 80% full was a ‘loss’ statement for me. That tiny little voice in my head said to me, “Wait Gayle, if we eat to 80% full, doesn’t that really mean we’ll still be 20% hungry?”
That voice is small, but it is powerful! And I was scared to be hungry.
While I couldn’t get my head around the wording of full/hungry, the concept of eating less did stick with me. Why? Because I was able to connect that idea with my desire to feel good. And feeling good meant feeling light. Feeling healthy. Feeling satisfied.
Feeling satisfied. Not full. Not boated. Not rolly polly. Not exhausted. Not gross.
So for the two months we were on the road, I ate food to satisfaction.
Here’s what eating to satisfaction meant to me:
- Not a lot of bread or pasta. Nope, I’m not on a ‘no-carb’ diet. I still eat bread and pasta. But I feel gross if I eat too much. So, I started eating my sandwiches in lettuce wraps. Did people look at me and roll their eyes? Probably – but that didn’t bother me now because I was just doing this so I didn’t feel gross. No other reason. Just that. Same with pasta. I had this AMAZING bowl of gnocchi one night. I ate maybe 1/4 of the dish. It was awesome. I was satisfied. Done. Look at me! I can have my cake and eat some of it too!
- A green smoothie as a meal replacement most days of the week. Why? Because if I eat a bigger breakfast, I’m not as hungry for lunch, so a quick shake is easy and hits the spot. Or, because I’m going to have a dinner out, so save my fun calories for that meal and, just in case I don’t have a big salad, I got some greenery in my system. I don’t do the shakes because I’m a ‘health nut’ – I do them because they are easy, pack in a lot of good stuff in an easy to drink format, and frankly, taste pretty good. Even Rj likes them. Really.
- I find myself ordering from the appetizer menu for my main meal. Nope, not because I’m all freaked out about portion size, but because I do find an appetizer-size meal is enough to make me feel satisfied. And there is no extra food roaming around my plate saying, “Come on, clean your plate.” And let’s be honest, I think the appetizers are usually yummier. I now find that a meal of a fun salad and splitting wings with Rj is just enough! And I ate wings! I love wings!
- And, FYI – who knew you could eat just two pieces of pizza and be happy? I thought for sure the magic number was three. Or four on an especially bad day.
There you have it – my secret to losing weight. Eat what makes you feel good and satisfied. Then put the fork down. I lost seven pounds in two months using this approach.
I seriously wish this wasn’t the reason I finally lost some weight because I feel like people are looking for some magic bullet in life and I can’t provide that OMG WOW factor to my solution.
I find this weight loss remedy very anti-climatic. Very no duh. Not overly scientific. No drama. Pretty no brainer stuff.
But it worked.
And who knows how things will be for me now that we are home for 4 months. But for the time being, I feel good. My clothes are fitting better. I’m looking better. I am stronger at the gym. And all of those things make me want to stay the course.
So for now, I’ll eat food that I enjoy and that makes me feel good. Physically and Mentally. And I will stop the minute I don’t feel good anymore.
Off to make a green smoothie for lunch. Then later I just might finish off that amazing cheese we just bought at the market down the road, with a few crackers, before dinner with friends.
Because I love cheese. And I will NEVER give up cheese.
Gayle H
